Instructions for Holiday Snooping.

This is my disclaimer: If you are not interested in knowing what you might get as a Holiday gift, then read no further. Children: Make sure your Folks don’t catch you reading this instructional blog.

Growing up, every family has its traditions. We had a few. One present Christmas eve, chocolate covered cherries gifted to dad every year (even though he never really liked them we later found out), and finding our parents present stash and/or figuring out what was wrapped under the tree.

The three of us kids, Jeff, Jeni, and me had become quite the pros at finding out what we were getting for Christmas every year. But like all pros, we floundered before we achieved Christmas sleuthing greatness.

Here is what does Not work: Poking holes in the wrapping paper. First off, you truly can’t make out what’s in the wrapped treasure by the small hole you just put in there. Secondly: What seemed like a small hole to you was in fact a gaping tear in the red or green patterned paper. A tear that was a tell-tale sign that sleuthing had occurred.

Then, pumping information from your siblings is also a losing proposition. For my sibs and me it was a bargaining chip. We would hold the valued information over each other’s heads like a doggy biscuit to a starving dog. But even in the times that we could pump the other for the info, the parents would inevitably find out the information leaked. Stands to reason that if your sibs leaked the info to you, then the adept parents could do the same in finding out if they KEPT the secret.

“So” you ponder, “what does work?” Scissors and tape. Allow me to explain. Find the tape that your parents (or any gift giver) used to wrap your presents. Then get your mitts on a small pair of scissors. It is important that the scissors be small enough to make a fine incision, and they should also be the pointy kind. Take the scissors and find the sweet spot where the wrapping paper was taped together.

Now cut the tape at the crease where the two bits of folded paper meet. GENTLE! Cut the paper itself, and you have tipped your hat and all will know that you’ve spied your gift. Carefully, and I do mean carefully lift the flap of wrapping paper to reveal the one side of wrapped gift. DO NOT get greedy. You only need to see the one side of the box to know what it is. Don’t see any logos or writing? One of two things. Either you are skilled enough to completely unwrap and then re-wrap the gift, or quit while you are ahead… Was that the car I heard pulling up the driveway? Make sure you have the time necessary to undo the unwrap.

For the record I was never upset that I learned what was under the tree on Christmas morning ahead of time, but I was super thrilled when I was genuinely surprised by a gift. The anticipation is the key to Holiday gifts. Not knowing is an excitement that is addictive and thrilling and magical all at once. That anticipation is gone the second you find out.

Nowadays my wife and I both pretty much know what we are getting for Christmas ahead of time. It happens as you get deeper into the marriage and you share all accounting info for the joint account. My thrill is not in the sleuthing anymore, but in finding ways to surprise my wife and family during this one special time each year.

I am also all pro when it comes to properly wrapping a present to be “sleuth proof”.

Happy Holidays!